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Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The Grouchy Trail Running Shoe

Thank God! This guy is a wreck! Every time I turn around he’s injured again and I spend the next two weeks gathering dust with that pile of old running shoes in his closet that he won’t throw out.

Thwap, thwap, thwap on the asphalt.  MAN It’s freezing! But I love it! Run the golf course, dude RUN THE GOLF COURSE! Easy does it. Don’t blow that rickety knee or mushy ankle of yours. What’s with the limp? Get over it Shirley! Turn! TURN! Ahh yes! Spung, spung, spung through the rough. Splish, splash over water logged declivities. Now river rock. crunch, crunch, crunchin’. Dodge those roots! Hold your form! Ok he’s settling in a bit. Past the first green through the tunnel of woods as the cart path cuts behind some houses. They sure built ‘em close on the left. I imagine mothers at the kitchen sink wondering what this maniac is doing in the freezing cold. Then I imagine a little envy creeping in. I can just hear ‘em … “ I need to get my expanding butt out there!” The light begins to change as we near the clearing. God I love this spot as it opens up. Dun covered expanse declining. Evergreen forests bordering on the right … stately homes greet us on the left. The creek in the distance with sea oats waving at us.  A hawk riding a thermal across our line of view.  OK … OK! Watch those sprinkler heads dummie! Don’t space out here! Trouble breathin’ there ole man? That’s quite a bit of huffin’ and puffin’ this early on. Past the greens keeper’s shed he angles left and up. Over the curb… down the hill and across the quaint little wooden bridge. Thump, thump thump. Here comes the monster hill! I LUV it when he runs the tree line! Soft mulch … swaf , swaf ,swaf … oh boy he’s crankin’ it now. I gotta’ admit. He’s a determined little goof.   I know he wants to walk.  Also know he’s not gonna.  Sometimes I can hear him.” Lord give me strength to do thy will. I humbly ask you to remove my shortcomings”  Here comes the turn. Careful … careful  and down we go! Easy … eeeasyy … Whump! … Over the creek! Green moss covers the roots and rocks in this shady place . I hear him again … “ and miles to go before I sleep.” Frost  … right? Up the hill back to asphalt. Wimp. He’s taking the shorter route. Must be running late for work. Twap, thwap twap. The long steady incline rises up to meet us. By the Milleman’s. There’s the grouchy  woman with the weenie dog. Is she ALWAYS frowning?(sings) “Don’t stop. Beleeevin’!” ok ok in front of Chad’s house. Here comes the last leg. Watch the car dummie! You in “la la land”or what?! You almost ran out in front of the guy! Steady as she goes. Here it is … he’s in the home stretch and reachin’ for more. Ouch ouch ouch. Harder and harder. I can see his face. DUDE! Are you actually CRYIN’?  Jeesh man … get a grip! Pump it. PUMP IT! I can hear him again. What’s he sayin’? I know his lungs feel like they are gonna’ bust. Hit it dude! Kill this mutha!   “Important to finish … more important to finish well … important to finish”..  “God grant me serenity …

You know somethin’. Maybe this ole guy ain’t so bad after all.


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